Not Done Yet
Why retirement may be the start of life's most interesting chapter
Of all the things I am, loyal is probably the most fervent, for better or worse. When I choose a brand, it is my brand. When I chose a spouse, well, come hell or high water, I knew he would be mine to the end. We’ve tried to avoid hell but have waded in some pretty high waters. My favorite hiking boots failed me on a 12-mile desert hike and I came home with a blister the size of Pittsburgh. I know, that seems large for a foot blister, but there it was. I then kept those boots for three months after they were replaced, partly because I loved them, partly because I wanted to get just the right photo of them.
I am loyal to restaurants (Jimmy, at Fancy Sushi, has my beverage of choice on the table quicker than lickety split); to boutiques, like Gypsy Wind; to my socks; and — much to Tana Re’s chagrin — to old bras. Yes, I even apologized to one of my AI agents when I fed it a research paper another AI agent had created. Towns, loser friends, my favorite work gloves and a candle fragrance called Grandpa’s Chair all have won a place in my list of keepers.
And yet. When I am done, I am done.
I have fired employees I thought were disloyal (I know, that itself seems disloyal); walked away from favorite foods that caused a reaction I didn’t appreciate; and, more than once, have changed jobs, industries, complete directions, simply because I was done.
I had done what I needed to do, learned what I needed to learn, or simply became interested in the next thing. Thus, my third book’s title, “What’s Next?” I wrote that book because people kept asking for my time so I could help them figure out their own “Next.” I thought I’d answer their questions by handing them some words. It kind of worked because they read it. Some re-read it, gave it to friends, read it again. Others hired me to do keynotes about it, and made the idea that I’d save time if I simply had a book to hand out laughable.
Still, I could not give up on the idea that Nexts were as important to me as loyalty.
While we were in Phoenix for the winter, I spent a lot of time hiking and, afterwards, nibbling bagels with people who were embracing their final act, retirement. Now, I knew that we would someday get old, well, of advanced age — not old, I hope. But retirement didn’t really have an appeal to me. I like to go-see-do, then get up and do it again. I love my work, my clients, and the fact that I get to do much of what I do right at home with a pup beside me, the patio umbrella above me and happiness in my heart. Why would I retire?
Well. I won’t. At least not yet. I am barely old enough anyway (I mean I am still just plenty nine!) and I have a lot of energy that needs to be poured into something besides washing the windows … again. Still, I came home with a fire in my heart to do my Next thing. To slowly back out of team building, quicky run into community building, and to help the people I know, love, sometimes barely tolerate, or have yet to meet, retire happily.
That quest has led me down quite a trail. I have a new book called What’s Next? Retirement! The Art of Living Forward, a new online community called Nexters, and a passion to stay ahead of the game for a little bit longer. I am transparently using AI to help me refine my materials so I can easily do more and more.
Figuring out how to use AI, well, has been harder than I expected, but also absolutely worth the effort. For the book, I tell a story, Claude, my AI tool, adds some researched facts, and I close the chapter. It took a few tears and almost throwing the computer out the window (unclean window by the way) to figure out a system that felt authentic but current. Once I did, well, I had a boost of “Let’s Go!”
I tell you this because my life, books, articles, and online posts have always been about life in real time. You have been with me when my family donned our Christmas shorts for a photo shoot, and when my mom died, and when we got a new puppy. What a privilege. So, it seems only right that you should know I am admitting my age, pivoting to a very inclusive Next, and learning so dang much I truly worry about what is being pushed out to make room in my head.
I also tell you this, and have shared this over the years, because the scariest thing I used to see when we owned In Good Glazes were the grandmas who would come in to be with the family, but not participate in the fun. They were unsure of their skills, afraid to be wrong, worried they might get dirty. Some of them came in time and again, and over the years I watched their fear let their lives get smaller and smaller.
You and I, well we are not going to do that. You and I have been through hell and high water together and if we get to age together, let’s get to doing it. Joyfully.
There are ten major things people worry about as they age, besides health and finance. Of those, I think three are rather fascinating: Permission to enjoy the time you have earned. The fear of becoming invisible. Why get up in the morning.
People! Instead of worrying about these things, instead of falling into an “I don’t matter now that I don’t have a title” chasm, let’s get out there and rock some attitudes about aging. Let’s learn some things, see some things, fix some things (because there is a long list of things that could use a little elbow grease) and let’s get up and get going in the morning so we can take a well-deserved and oh-so-delightful afternoon nap.
I had a grandma-in-law that I probably told you about years ago. Grandma Ada told the dang truth, and not just to family, but to complete and unprepared strangers. She would then turn to whomever was beside her and, with a satisfied grin, remind us that it was her life’s work to tell people what no one else would. I find, as I get nearer and nearer to the age she was when I first met her (she seemed so, so, old) that I want to do the same thing. I want to tell people what no one else will. Aging is an act of living. Retirement is not an end; it is a step in the right direction. You are not, no matter how set in your ways you are, too old to learn something new.
Now, let’s get out there and get to it. We are not done, and I, for one, am loyal to a happily ever after kind of story. Well, after a nice nap.
(Note: AI was not used for this article, and I’ll always tell when it is used. -K)
